Happy New Year!!!
Whaaat??? Yea. I know it’s March!
Let me tell you friend, I’m making claim to a do over! A hard reset. A fresh start. A clean slate.
Y’all know that I LOVE the end of every year and all the dreaming and scheming about the new year on it’s way. Last year was no different. I was so excited for this new year.
Then came January 1st. The start of this year was nothing like I anticipated. I’ve had so much personal growth since January 1 that I didn’t see coming. I should’ve known since my word of the year is stretch!
We are complex people, and a layer of my onion has been pulled away, revealing things I either thought I’d already dealt with or things I didn’t even realize about myself and the way I’m showing up in the world. Fortunately, I have an awesome coach to thank for helping me through peeling back that layer.
To start the year, things didn’t go well. Little things went wrong that made every day feel like a struggle. Nothing terrible, just annoyances. Then at the end of January I finished my free mini course and experienced what I’m now calling “the slump.”
You see, I’ve found myself in the slump before. I create something big, give it my all, and release it into the world and BAM!
I hit a wall.
I have a hard time continuing on in my work. Self doubt sets in. Who’s reading what I have to say anyway? Why bother? This is never going to work.
That’s when my coach started asking me about my upper limit problems. Read all about those in the book The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks. Seriously. Go read it. It makes so much sense!
Along with upper limit problems, my coach asked me to define what success and living up to my potential looks like for me. This meant releasing ideas I’ve held onto for YEARS! It meant admitting to myself that it’s ok to have a different outcome than what I had planned.
To change something that’s SO INGRAINED in you can be hard and painful.
Digging even deeper, we discovered a lot of value conflicts. Anytime I’m living out one of my values (which is a good thing!) my mind creates a negativity around it that keeps me from enjoying it. As soon as I lean into joy, my mind reminds me of the opposite, leaving me to live in SO MUCH FEAR.
Fear of disappointing. Fear that I might lose all that’s good in my life. I’d hear myself say, “It’s too good to be true. This is too perfect. Something is bound to happen.”
See how I set myself up so I can’t win? My life felt like one giant pot of resistance, wanting to enjoy all the good, but scared to really lean into it.
Discovering so many values conflicts in my life was painful. There was some sorrow in knowing my whole life has had more suffering than necessary because of my own thinking. I’m proud I’ve been able to love myself through it and forgive myself.
There has been remorse in the forgiving. Remorse because I feel so bad for having treated myself that way for so long. I’m embracing the idea that when we know better, we do better.
There has been grieving...wondering how differently my life would’ve been, how much happier I could’ve felt all these years if I had allowed myself to truly enjoy things.
As painful as it was to learn this about myself, it was also very freeing!
Being aware of my behaviors helped me change them. We can’t change what we don’t know is happening, right? Now I’m able to stop myself from going to the negative side when I’m feeling joy and happiness. It’s not easy. I’m still learning and I suspect it’s something I’ll always be working on.
Allowing the pain, sitting with it and not trying to change it or power through it has helped me get to the other side so much more easily. Having the support of my coach and my VA (who totally picked up the slack when I couldn’t) made all the difference!
My coach sat with me in the mess and asked the questions to help me go deeper into what I was discovering. It was painful, like the shutting-everything-down-doing-nothing-and-only-existing-for-several-days kind of painful. I’ve come out on the other side more clear and much stronger.
The beauty in all this is I didn’t have to do it alone. If I’d gone through this alone, I wouldn’t have had the same results. It’s so much harder to gain the perspective that a coach can give when we’re on our own.
You don’t have to do it alone, either. I am here for you! I love sitting with my clients in the mess the same way my coach did for me.
I want to help you move beyond the fear that holds you back so you can truly enjoy each day and begin working towards the big dreams you have like starting your own business or going back to work because being home with the kids isn’t for you.
I want to help you out of self doubt so you can feel more confident about moving towards the goals you set at the beginning of the year instead of letting them go untouched for yet another year.
I want to help you with your own do over. It’s ok if you haven’t worked on your goals in the last month. It’s ok if you don’t even like the goals you set for this year. We can work together to shift things around so they work for you and so you can have goals you’re excited to work on.
I’ve declared March 5th as my day to begin again. I’m starting again with the same anticipation and enthusiasm as I had as I approached January 1st.
Join me! Everyone deserves a do over!
With a fresh start I know good things are on the way. I can feel it!
Happy New Year!
I’m excited to help you find that something more you’ve been craving. You’ve got big things to do in this world and I’m ready to help you begin living your legacy NOW.
To find out how working together will uplevel your life so you can leave your fears behind, begin to write a new story for your life, and feel more bold, fulfilled, and sparkly, book a FREE 30 minute discovery call.